I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: A Look Back.

The action icon is rightfully celebrated as an Hollywood heavyweight. But, at the height of his blockbuster fame in the eighties and nineties, he also delivered several genuinely hilarious comedies. A prime example is Kindergarten Cop, which hits its 35th anniversary this holiday season.

The Film and An Iconic Moment

In the hit comedy, Schwarzenegger portrays a tough police officer who masquerades as a elementary educator to track down a criminal. During the story, the crime storyline acts as a simple backdrop for Schwarzenegger to film humorous interactions with kids. Without a doubt the standout belongs to a child named Joseph, who unprompted announces and informs the former bodybuilder, “It's boys who have a penis, females have a vagina.” Arnold replies icily, “Thanks for the tip.”

The young actor was played by youth performer Miko Hughes. In addition to this part featured a recurring role on Full House as the schoolyard menace to the famous sisters and the pivotal role of the child who returns in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He continues to act today, with a slate of movies listed on his IMDb. Furthermore, he is a regular on the con circuit. He recently recalled his memories from the set of Kindergarten Cop 35 years later.

Memories from the Set

Q: To begin, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.

Wow, I can't remember being four. Do you remember anything from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're brief images. They're like visual recollections.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My mother, mainly would take me to auditions. Often it was a mass tryout. There'd be a room full of young actors and we'd all just have to wait, be seen, be in there less than five minutes, deliver a quick line they wanted and that's all. My parents would coach me on the dialogue and then, when I became literate, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your impression of him?

He was incredibly nice. He was playful. He was good-natured, which I suppose isn't too surprising. It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a productive set. He was fun to be around.

“It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a major movie star because that's what my parents told me, but I had never really seen his movies. I sensed the excitement — it was exciting — but he didn't frighten me. He was simply playful and I only wanted to hang out with him when he was available. He was busy, obviously, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd flex and we'd be hanging off. He was really, really generous. He purchased for each child in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was the hottest tech. It was the must-have gadget, that iconic bright yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It eventually broke. I also received a real silver whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all were gifted copies as well.

Do you remember your days on set as being positive?

You know, it's amusing, that movie is such a landmark. It was a huge film, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, the direction of Ivan Reitman, the location shoot, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the original Game Boy was just released. That was the coolest toy, and I was quite skilled. I was the smallest kid and some of the bigger kids would ask for my help to pass certain levels on games because I could do it, and I was felt accomplished. So, it's all childhood recollections.

That Famous Quote

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember anything about it? Did you grasp the meaning?

At the time, I probably didn't know what the word provocative meant, but I knew it was provocative and it caused the crew to chuckle. I knew it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given approval in this case because it was humorous.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it came about, from what I understand, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. Certain bits of dialogue were established early on, but once they had the kids together, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they refined it on set and, I suppose it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "We're thinking. We want Miko to say this. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "Give me a moment, I'll decide tomorrow" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she wasn't sure, but she believed it could end up as one of the most memorable lines from the movie and her instinct was correct.